Its Ok to Dream of Being a Mother
“What do you plan to do when you graduate?”
As a senior in college, I get this question asked of me a lot. Honestly, I have gotten similar questions since my high school days. And guess what? I still don’t. At least that is what I say.
I have come up with various responses because it gets tiring saying that I don’t know. And my answer changes from week to week depending on what is my most recent idea or dream. I have come up with all kinds of answers for this question, but honestly the answer is never really my true dream. It’s just a career because everyone has to have a dream career right?
I am done with this myth that we have to have some career to pursue after graduation. Don’t get me wrong. I think it’s important to spend my life wisely and purposely. I don’t wish to sit around doing nothing, but I don’t think I have to have some passionate career that I plan to fall into after graduation. I believe God will show me the next step and show me how I can live for him best after I graduate, but I am no longer convinced that it must be some great money-making career.
In fact, my dream, my longing that has been my longing for ever since I can remember, the thing I truly want to do when I graduate is be a wife and mother, a nurturer, a homemaker. Ok, so yeah, I know. I should be content and not sit around waiting for him to drop into my life. And you’re absolutely right, I should keep moving forward into God’s plans for me and not just sit around waiting for “Mr. Best” to come along and make me his wife. Honestly, I might not ever get that dream or not in the way I imagine it.
But I am tired of trying to beat around the bush. I am tired of being ashamed of what I really love best. I am tired of being afraid to admit that I want to be a wife and mother because it sounds like I am not grateful for this season of my life. I am afraid I will sound like a desperate old maid if I tell the truth.
But recently I have been thinking about this very thing. And I suddenly came to the conclusion that it’s ok. In fact, it’s good and beautiful! This is the way God created me! God actually created women to be nurturers. In fact, I think I can say that he has created all women to be nurturers and mothers. Yeah, all women! The problem is that you think that I must think that all women should get married, but here you are wrong. I don’t believe marriage is for all women and I honestly don’t even know if marriage will be for me, but I still believe that all women should be mothers and nurturers in some way.
I believe a woman can be a loving, nurturering, motherly woman whether she is married and has her own children or not and I believe that is the way God has uniquely created women. I don’t believe we singles have to get married to be able to do this. Obviously it will look a little different than the married woman with children, but I do think that we single women can love, nurture, and have a mothering effect on the church body. We can babysit for parents or work in child care ministries in the church, as two obvious ways to love and nurture children. But honestly, I believe this even goes beyond just children. We can be nurturers to other adults. Women have a unique way of loving others and we can use our uniqueness to minister love to the body of Christ in a way that men cannot do. There would be a major gap in the body of Christ if we were to lack in females.
I welcome all thoughts and ideas and more processed ideas than mine.