Tea Party Conversation

As my sisters and I sat enjoying a delightful tea party, Elisabeth asks, “What are some good questions to ask, to get a conversation going?” That was all we need to get us going on a lengthy conversation about communication.
First we discussed the basics. What are some good questions to ask? We girls didn’t have much of an answer to that. Rather we discussed how difficult it was for us to actually get into a good interesting conversation. How helpful it would be if there was a book which just gave you lots of good questions to ask, but then when you get into a real life conversation those questions just fly out the window and are either forgotten or just don’t seem to be the right ones. Or some times we contemplate long and hard about what were going to talk about, but conversations never go as planned.
Then there are always those awkward silences. What do you do about that? Well, really a silence is not so bad. I think some people think that there can never be a silent moment, but I think that a little silence can be even a good thing at times. Or sometimes it is just time to say “It was nice talking to you! Have a nice day. Goodbye!”
We went rattling off about, talking to guys or the opposite sex. Yes, there is always those awkward years for a girl, when she just doesn’t know how to talk relaxingly to a guy. It just puts her in a fluster and she gets all embarrassed and nervous. Then we get out of that stage and learn to actually talk to the opposite sex and have a normal conversation without getting flustered.
There is also those years when, at least for some girls, we are super shy and don’t know how to talk at all to anyone. Our feet become a primary spot of investigation. Then we work past those years. For me it was when I was around 13 and my family changed churches and although the people were friendly, I realized that if I was going to make friends there, then I was going to have to step out of my “comfort zone” and be the one to talk to others and meet knew people.
Then there is that question as to how to end a conversation. If the conversation has gone too far and no longer is edifying, how do you stop that conversation and start on a new one. I guess we just decided the only answer to that was to simply change the subject.
In the end we laughed over the fact that we had just had a rather extensive conversation over the question “How do you start a conversation?”

What about you? Do you find it hard to start a conversation with your friends? Do you find it difficult to end a conversation-gone-awry? Did you have those awkward years of being flustered whenever a guy talks to you? Or are you really good at talking to others and you have some tips for me and my sisters to improve on our conversation skills? I would love to hear your thoughts on the subject.

Random fact: It is now getting to blackberry season, and because we have wild blackberry brambles near us that we can pick for free, it is so much fun. It is quite and adventure to go through and find brambles and scare away snakes and pull off ticks and wander to far from the rest of your group and wonder if you’ll get back to them alive and try to keep from getting too scratched up from the thorns. Yes, quite an adventure. Wild blackberry picking is the best!


  1. I love this post! Haha, I'm one of those people who HATE silence, and I do my best fill it with something. Although, 50% of the time I'm in a conversation I'm laughing. I do enjoy serious conversations, but usually only with close friends. Sometimes it's hard to talk to people you don't know. I remember you, Hannah, being the first person around my age to speak to me at Living Way, so thank you for that. :)

    1. Thanks Michaela! I am glad you enjoyed this post.

  2. I enjoyed reading this post, Hannah. I find it's true that, no matter how many topics I can think of to converse about before a conversation starts, once I'm standing face to face with that person--especially someone I don't know very well--all those ideas seem too rehearsed and/or stupid to actually say out loud. I've always been rather shy, which makes it hard for me to talk to people I don't know. Still, I have slowly gotten better at it out of the sheer determination to do it more often. I think when it comes to conversation, we can all take our cue from Pride & Prejudice: when Darcy says that he does not possess the talent of conversing easily with those he does not know, Elizabeth replies rather matter-of-factly, "Perhaps you should take your aunt's advice and practice."

    1. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Hannah, and for sharing the quote from Pride and Prejudice.

  3. Blueberry-picking is the best!

    1. Actually, "Anonymous", (who I have a feeling isn't really so anonymous), I have the opinion that BLACKBERRY picking is the best.;)

  4. Interesting conversation. I try to ask people questions that they normally don't get asked. Personally I could care less to answer a question about school, work, every day life. Everyone asks and answers those questions a million times and we easily get bored. Instead I try to focus on interesting things that they might not have thought about before.

    a few examples:

    In my free time I like to [insert crazy hobby], what do you do in your free time?

    If you could wake up tomorrow anywhere in the world where would you be, why would you be there, and who would you bring along with you?

    Ever broken the law (besides speeding, come on lets be original)?

    Do you think it’s possible to be “just friends” with someone of the opposite sex? What if they are attractive to you?

    What’s one thing that you just can’t say no to?

    Let’s compare embarrassing stories. You go first.

    So let me get your opinion on something . . . [insert anything interesting to ask opinion about, relationships, food, religion, friends, etc.]?

    Great post, happy conversating

    1. Hey Jesse,
      Thanks for the helpful tips. Those are some good questions to ask. I might try some of them out sometime or try to think of some of my own!
      Haha! As for the one about sharing embarrassing stories, but letting the other person go first. After they share their story you look at your watch and then say, "That was a great story, but, man, I really gotta be going now. Goodbye!" hehe! :)


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