Graced with Grace

    Time might erase some things, But it can’t erase everything. It can’t ever erase your smile from my heart Or the joy that once You brought into my life, The dance that you put in my steps And the twinkle you put in my eyes.   Time may erase some things, But it can’t erase the memory of you From my mind. I may grow old and grey, wrinkled and lame, Or I might die while still very young, But time won’t erase your face Etched into my heart.   Time may erase some things, But it can never erase The love that I had for you. And I know that I never loved you As well as I have learned to love another, But it was you who taught me More about love and to love more.   It was you who taught me What it looks like to fight and fight hard, To not give up, And to laugh when life brings pain. You taught me life is too short ...

Today marks 11 years since my brother, Micah, went home to be with Jesus.     Eleven years ago! How could it be that long ago That I last heard your laughter, Last saw your smile, Last listened to another of your jokes? Your memories never fade, But sometimes it seems impossible That it really was eleven years ago. To many things have occurred since then, Too many new stories have been written, Yet some how you are weaved in with memories That shape our lives from day to day. You drift through the air In a thought, in a word, in a short story Told of you. You're there yet it was still Eleven years ago that I last heard your breath. Too many years of silence, Yet you still speak. Too many years without you, Yet your story still lives. But oh, how I long to throw My arms around you once more, To listen to yet another joke That always made me laugh, To hear you sing and play your guitar– Oh, to hear that voice a...

Joining in with Five Minute Friday and the word today is Reflect.   It seems life has moved on without you Yet somehow you are still there, A flash of you comes drifting through the air. From day to day I smile as I remember Once again your jokes, smile, and laughter. I flip through the pictures on my phone, Ten years ago, oh, how time has flown. My hero, my brother, my friend, Reflecting –allowing the heart to mend. I don’t cry too much anymore, But I always remember those days before. But life moved on and I have grown, And while I live in a world unknown, You live in the past where life is a memory And your story becomes a part of history. But I do smile when I remember. Its been ten years on the seventeenth of December

Some people may choose to forget Because memory causes pain. But I chose to remember, Even though I cry like the rain. I choose to remember that smile of yours Even though it makes me cry. I remember your laugh But it makes me ache inside. I remember the way you strummed your guitar And how it made me dance with joy. But I don’t dance when I remember. Instead my body shakes with sobs untold.   Why do I choose this road of memory, When memory is suffering And forgetfulness is bliss? I can’t explain a pain worth enduring Yet  I chose to remember and not forget. Days come and days go by. People ask how the brother did die And I tell them the how, but not the why? I remember. I did not forget. His story lives on. I choose to share. I will not forget. But lest you think it easy For me to tell his story once more. Remember, I chose to remember And not forget. And memory hurts.  

Sonnet of the Griever   She stared across the room of walls and space. Her life was dark and full of painful years. She held her breath and clenched her teeth in place. She pushed on forward, smiled, hiding tears. But life was changed that day and year, with death, Her brother here and gone the coming day. She questions God and says, why take his breath? She longs for answers, life goes on its way. Into this grief their seeps a peace sublime. Within this darkness shines a light of hope. Though pain remains still deep throughout her time, Because of Christ she is not left to grope. So in the darkest hour when she grieves. She runs to grace and to the cross she cleaves.         ~Hannah Leake~     Note: this is a sonnet that I had to write for a school assignment. I hope you enjoy! ;)

    Kind and gentle, Patiently teaching little sister. You were her cowboy.   Loving and strong, Manly and tough, And sometimes a little rough. You were her cowboy.   Always a smile, Always rejoicing, Laughing and joking. You were her cowboy.   Strumming the guitar, Humming, whistling, singing, Writing a melody. You were her cowboy.   Working hard, Persevering, Never let life put you down. You were her cowboy.   Running the race, Always brave, Embracing life. You were her cowboy.   Young and handsome, Her older brother, Her hero, Her cowboy.       Written in loving memory of Micah who died 9 years ago today. Although Micah was never really a cowboy, he often wore a cowboy hat and sometimes dressed like one. His characteristics also remind me of that of a cowboy's. Lastly, cowboys are one of my biggest heroes in life and Mi...

Yesterday marked 7 years since my brother Micah went home to be with Jesus. I miss him a lot! Life will never go back to "normal". I sometimes think about the things Micah might would be doing now if he had lived. He probably would have gone off to college. I would eagerly wait for each home visit as I do with my other brothers. I would have fun playing the matchmaking game for him, trying to find the perfect girl for him to marry. I miss that I never got to see him graduate from high school, or college. I miss that I'll never see him get married or have children. Nevertheless, I rejoice! Yes, I miss him, and yet I rejoice. I rejoice, because I know he is home. He fought the good fight and won. He completed the race with endurance. He has reached the goal! He has won the prize! I rejoice, because he rejoices! I rejoice because God is awesome and His grace is sufficient for me! Micah is so much happier where he is now, than if he were do...

I thought this picture of two of my sisters was so sweet. It was actually taken about 8 years ago. I am one of those people who can have a hard time showing my love to others. I might really love someone a lot, but I just don’t know how to tell or show them or else I am too shy to. I am not speaking here necessarily of romantic love either, I am speaking of love in general; love for my siblings, my parents, my friends, and others. I have shared with you the story of my brother, Micah , and how he died and all. Just now I was thinking about him and just thinking how much I really loved him, and yet I am afraid I didn’t show him or tell him very well how much I really loved him. I am sure he knows that I loved him, yet I wish I had showed that love to him better.  I think one of the biggest reasons for not showing that love for him is that I thought he would get better. I thought I would have decades of more years with him. But no, that wasn’t God’s plan. God took him home shortly b...

  Dear Micah, Today marks 6 years since you went home to be with Jesus. I miss you lots. I miss hearing you say “Chimpanzees on the roof!” or “No sirry, Bob! No sirry, Bob!”. I miss hearing you sing and play your guitar. I miss the silly songs you would make up about someone who walked into your room. I miss competing with you on who had better handwriting (You know I won on that one, right?) I miss the competitions to see who can do the most lessons of Math in one day. I miss your laughter and smile. I miss your jokes and humor that made me laugh so often. I miss the funny stories you would post on Xanga. I miss seeing you wear that “Stinky hat”. And, yes, we all remember how much you loved Peanut butter, right? Haha! ;) Or how much you detested mint ice cream, or mint cake or mint brownies or even mint pancakes? ;) haha! Oh, yes, and beavers gnaw on trees, right? ;) There is so much that I miss and will keep on missing until the day I see you again. But I know, however much I m...

Here is a song that Micah wrote. Deep Inside You already know what you've meant to me You know more then I of my thoughts of you But let me try now to express my love To pour out my heart with the limit of words The comfort you've given is beyond my song And tell of your mercy its worthless to try To express how you've loved me I'd run out of time If there's words that can tell you they're above my mind Chorus: So I'll love You from deep inside The most precious of thoughts in my heart will hide So whenever you look at my heart You'll see a fullness of love that won't depart What can I say of the peace that crushed doubt And the grace I've received is past finding out Since when You called me to enter your rest My heart has to speak cause my mouth can't express You're a mystery to me that I cannot solve An unsearchable tower that will never fall The highest below and the lowest above Will never attain the knowledge of your love By Micah L...

The Character of a Gentleman Although Micah was by no means a perfect man, he did have some wonderful character traits. I will start with humor. Micah had an amazing sense of humor. Micah could make things that for most people would seem boring or painful into an enjoyable and even amusing scenario. If someone was gloomy or having a bad day he always knew how to cheer them up even if he wasn’t feeling well himself. He was great at telling jokes. When everyone else was roaring with laughter he would just keep a genuinely serious face, yet you could tell that his joke got the effect that he was looking for. He loved to serve God and others. He was always looking for ways to serve and be a blessing. At one point when he was sick, he wasn’t allowed to do certain jobs, so instead he would just go find something else that he could do even if no one had asked him to do it. He would often go out of his way to help someone. He loved to worship God. One of his most favorite things to do was pla...

God’s Grace in or Lives Today, December 17, 2010, is five years since Micah has gone home to be with the Lord. I would like to share with you some things that my family and I have learned through and after his sickness. Through the four years that Micah was sick my whole family learned a lot about just trusting the Lord. We had to learn to trust Him for everything. My dad had lost his job in the second year of Micah’s sickness, so we had to trust God for provision. God never forgot us though. We always had enough. Our church was always there for us ready to help in any way they could. The gifts that we received from our church and other people were abundant. The meals that were brought over were numerous and there was always someone to help or baby-sit if we needed it. God used this time in our life to strength and build up our faith and walk with Him. We had to trust God about Micah. We had to trust Him that He knew exactly how long Micah should live and that He knows what is best for...

The Story Micah, my third oldest brother, was born December 22, 1989. It all began on Thanksgiving Day, November 22, 2001. Micah was climbing down from a tree and grabbed hold of a dead branch and fell 20 feet. He was still alive but in great pain. So he was taken to the hospital, where they found out he had a broken femur, torn spleen, hole in his lungs, and fractured vertebrae. He was in intensive care for six days, and then transferred to a different hospital where they put a rod into his leg and found out that he had ALL leukemia. Micah then started chemotherapy and had treatment that lasted two and a half years. He had to be at the hospital most everyday of the first four months, meaning my oldest brother, Jesse, who was only fifteen at the time, had to watch six children while my mom was with Micah and Dad at work. After about one and a half years he took mostly pills and didn’t have to go to the hospital as much. When two and a half years had past they took out his port and fini...

I would like to tell you about an extraordinary young man. His name is Micah and he is my third oldest brother, who died almost 5 years ago. Before I tell you about him though, I would like to tell you why I am going to tell you about him. First I hope that all those who read his story may be blessed greatly by it and be encouraged and comforted through it. I pray that even though my brother, Micah, has now been in heaven for about 5 years, that his life story may touch the lives of many and bring many people to Christ. I pray that when you read his story and all that I write about him, that you would be pointed to Christ and the cross and that you would see an amazing and powerful God. I will be sharing about Micah all this December. I hope you will enjoy all that you read or see, and be pointed to Christ and His irresistible grace. God bless you!